33 Years….
A relationship born from rebellion and thrill
Defiant to parents, a child with a will.
It will all end in tears they said with a frown,
But all that I wanted was that bad boy in town.
33 years of anguish and pain
33 years of my life down the drain.
As I walked down the aisle the traditional bride
My dad by my side with more sadness than pride
Don’t do it he begged, it’s still not too late
To change your mind and alter your fate
33 years of anguish and pain
33 years of my life down the drain
As I look back the sign’s crystal clear
That controlling man that I once held so dear
With harsh words and firm actions was put in my place
Was nine years later until my dad saw my face
33 years of anguish and pain
33 years of my life down the drain
Removed from my loved ones, a family so dear
No contact, no visits, a life filled with fear.
Nothing to keep me, except one stubborn small bit
To ashamed of the truth yet too frightened to quit
33 years of anguish and pain
33 years of my life down the drain
To those on the outside I was bubbly and loud
A persona, a barrier created to banish the cloud
Eleven years in I thought it would change
When my children were born he became very strange
33 years of anguish and pain
33 years of my life down the drain
I protected my offspring with fearsome acts
Keeping them safe from the harm and the facts
For ten I years I coped, tears hidden not telling
Taking the thumps, bones breaking not yelling
33 years of anguish and pain
33 years of my life down the drain
I hid it, I lied, I took all the blame
Ensuring their childhood, like friends was the same
Then one day it changed, one terrible view
An argument wrong and at once they both knew
33 years of anguish and pain
33 years of my life down the drain
I knew all along that my bones they would mend
The words hurt the most, venom without end
Mind games and torment, a tiring state
Hard to keep going with that on my plate
33 years of anguish and pain
33 years of my life down the drain
Friends started to question excuses I made
Stopped coming to call, a price that I paid
The violence continued, it quickened in pace
Resulting in one time the blade by my face
33 years of anguish and pain
33 years of my life down the drain
My wardrobe of clothes shredded with glee
The look on his face so scary to see
My daughter objected which gained her his hand
Was then that he crossed my line in the sand
33 years of anguish and pain
33 years of my life down the drain
They took him away those men in the van
All of a sudden an old drunken man
Protesting his rights and how he could do
To his wife and his children what he wanted to
33 years of anguish and pain
33 years of my life down the drain
I thought I would crumble, I thought I would fold
Until friends ventured forward and I became bold
No more am I cowed I know he was wrong
I’m proud and I’m brave, what’s more I am strong
33 years of anguish and pain
33 years but never again……………….
Claire – 2014
[name changed to protect identity]